Oh my HEART!

The past couple days have been some of my favorites. My heart has almost exploded in the best way possible. Why?! Let me tell you, please!

In the past week I had the opportunity to spend time with children & youth from an orphanage swimming, brading hair, singing, & playing games together. I had an opportunity to meet the founders of this orphanage & hear their story of God’s leading to that place. My friends & I were able to do our best to encourage & love on them well, all while learning so so much. 

More recently my friends & I had the priviledge and honor to visit a school in Bogor, Indonesia. This school is ENTIRELY run by refugee families waiting to be resettled in different countries. These are people who had to flee their country because of religious persecution and genocides from the middle east, and they have chosen to make the most of their “waiting time” in being resettled to a new country by creating a school for refugee’s of all ages! There are English, math, science, and history/geography classes. The staff are ALL volunteers, who are also refugees waiting to be resettled. This is a school that is run ENTIRELY off of donors, extended family members & anyone else who feels compelled to give

Are you interested in giving to this organization? Please contact me for more information!

These families and some children without family members, are patiently waiting to be resettled, but the very unfortunate reality is, that they do not know when they will be resettled. For some, it will be 2 years, and for others it will be 25 years. To make matters even more difficult, Individuals who are under refugee status that are waiting to be resettled pernamently, are not allowed to be employed in the country of their waiting, and also do not recieve any type of pension in the meantime. They are also not allowed to be enrolled in that countries school system, so they actually have to go around the “rules” and create a school of their own if there isnt one established specifically for refugees already.

So you might wonder, what does this mean for those who are waiting months, let along years or decades to be resettled into a new country? They must rely on connections. They must come together in unity & dream together of what they are to make of in this time. Often times, when it comes to financially supporting themselves for basic living, that comes down to family members and friends who have been resettled into a new country already. As far as schooling goes, that is up to them if the UNCR has not provided in that area.

These peoples lives are literally on “pause” for a period of time that is unknown. That in itself is terribly unjust, but the integrity these people walk in never less, is astounding.

In the past couple days, I’ve had the honor of becoming friends with some refugee young adult woman. 19 and 20 years old, these gals are teaching English, math, science, and geography to people of all ages. In the midst of waiting to be resettled, they are making the most of it, and creating a positive global impact for these people waiting to move forward with life & it will be a ripple effect that lasts for generations and generations. WOW.

Friends and I have been able to play futsol-basiccally mini soccer with them(I have a new found love for soccer! So all you soccer friends, when I get back, I’m coming for you!), eat meals, spend time together, and just do life together for the past several days. I have learned so much from them, and have been inspired to say the least.
.
Hanging out with these amazing refugee families and young adults, i’m in my happy place. I feel so honored to be here & its been eye opening to put to real life the experiences that staff, youth, and some friends have shared back from home who once were refugees too. God has gifted me with having relationships with people back in the US who also experienced the hardships, the life of waiting, and the test of resiliency that these new friends of mine in Indonesia are currently facing. My heart has been breaking, yet also being filled with hope for all these peoples lives & what world changers they are in the US and here in Indonesia.

Shout out to you my friends & loved ones back in Michigan & Chicago that have endured what these people are currently enduring. & growing into the world changers that you are made to be. You amaze me!

I feel as if one day here in Indonesia has provided me more than a months worth of knowledge and experience. My heart is currently feeling so full.

On an even more personal note, I have been intentional about using this time to also develop a lifestyle of speaking truth over myself in the hopes to grow into these declarations all around. I am currently reading a book called, “God is good” by Bill Johnson, and it has been rockin my socks off. I highly suggest this read! I’ve come to a conclusion that there is no turning back for me on trusting the goodness of Abba. So with that, I’ve got nothing to loose by declaring truth over myself & others!

We all struggle with something. That is no lie! For me, it’s been shame. It’s been guilt. It’s been carrying emotional weight I was never meant to carry. Over the past several weeks, I’ve written out a personal reminder statement & would love to share it with you. My thoughts are that as I remind myself of who I am, who I am becoming, where my identity comes from, and the goodness of God, I will start to live like it as my heart receives. It is so awesome! Words are so powerful. They speak death or life, and I am done speaking or thinking of myself any less that the Father of this universe thinks of me. 

I don’t always believe these truths written about me below & sometimes I walk in the opposite, but I know that I’mmma be speaking this out until I believe it with all my heart. Sometimes good things take work & i’m ready to do that word of simply receiving & becoming. Watch out, this girl is believing to become an unstoppable daughter of the King of Kings! haha! But truly it’s an invitation to all of us, regardless of who you are or what we’ve done. How awesome is that.

So basically, this is what I am intentionally reminding myself everyday. & as I speak it, I start to become it. Woah. Come one. Soooo cool! Take a read if you like, & if you feel so led, I encourage you to do the same for yourself! God wants to partner with us, who do you dream to be? Start speaking it over yourself! 

Here is who I dream to be: 

Teach me your decrees Jesus, I will keep them forever.

Give me and understanding & I will listen to your instruction & put them to practice with all my HEART.

Let me walk along the path of your commands, for that is where my happiness is found & you set me heart free.

Give me an excitement for your guidance, rather than a heart for the need of control. Turn my eyes away from things that don’t really matter & give me life through your words.

Reassure me of your promises made to those who are in awe of you.
Help me abandon my shameful ways and mentalities, for your regulations are good and perfect.

I long to walk in obedience to you Jesus. Renew my life with your true goodness.

God you only think & see through the eyes of love. I belong to the Father of all that is right in this world. Let me see what you are doing and I will follow.

I cannot afford to think of myself any different than the way you see me. The best gift I can give myself and others is to value myself the way you value me.

You heal me and you have given me a new heart of wholeness. I walk unashamed & embrace forgiveness upon myself and others.

You promise that I am in good hands with you and I have chosen to trust you fully.

You desire to give good gifts & simply ask me to ask.

You are the father of impossibilities. I have full permission to dream BIG!

I am growing into a woman of heavenly strength, heavenly discernment, heavenly forgiveness & wisdom. I am unashamed of who I’ve been, & who I am becoming. I am unashamed of my weakness because you make all things new.

I am free to live presently & free from any mistakes in the past.

I release grace upon myself to grow& I deeply enjoy being a vessel in bringing the kingdom of heaven, all good & life giving things down to earth.

Abba, you are my father, my lover, and my best friend.

I am worthy of affection and how much more do you really want to give.

I will never loose my wonder and joy through your goodness. I declare that my understanding is always secondary to trusting your goodness.

Peace & gratitude to you, friend. 

Kailey